Finding a Balance While Working Remote w/ CSM Office Hours

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This is a podcast episode titled, Finding a Balance While Working Remote w/ CSM Office Hours. The summary for this episode is: <p>This week the topic for discussion is around working remotely, balancing your work and home life.</p><p><br></p><p>A weekly segment:</p><p>CSM Office Hours</p><p>Every Tuesday. 11:30am ET.</p><p><a href="" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"></a></p><p>--</p><p>If you want to join the discussion with thousands of other customer success leaders, join</p><p>Gain Grow Retain: <a href="" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"></a></p><p>This podcast is brought to you by Jay Nathan and Jeff Breunsbach...</p><p>Jay Nathan: <a href="" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"></a></p><p>Jeff Breunsbach: <a href="" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"></a></p>
Perspectives on emotional intelligence - Reading the room
02:29 MIN
Emotional intelligence: Self awareness and empathy
02:03 MIN
Give yourself time to recharge
02:13 MIN
Be able to step away from your desk
01:38 MIN
Pick up a new hobby to help recharge
01:41 MIN

Speaker 1: Welcome to the Gain Grow Retain Podcast.

Speaker 2: Hey, Gain Grow Retain. Let me tell you about the MarTech Podcast, hosted by Benjamin Shapiro, brought to you by the HubSpot Podcast Network. Episodes are 30 minutes and he talks all about strategies and stories from world class marketers on how they're using technology to generate growth and achieve business outcomes. One in particular of late is unifying and activating your customer data, something that we talk about all the time in customer success. So, go listen to the MarTech Podcast wherever you get your podcasts.

Speaker 3: All righty, so we are recording. If you would not like to be video, that's totally fine. I won't pressure you or call you out. But I would love to hear from the different rooms. I got a room by default with Oliver and Josh, who have been path hosts in the past, and they shared their perspective as well, so that was a ton of fun. Did somebody from room one want to give an overall summary? It looks like that was Dana, Jason, Mackenzie, Maricel, Wally, or Yasmin.

Speaker 4: I can do it for our group. We had a lot of really interesting conversations. So first and foremost, when it came to emotional intelligence, we all had different perspectives, right. Whether it was your emotional intelligence in a work environment, emotional intelligence over Zoom, right. If you're doing a webinar, how do you read the room when you can't? There's nobody to read. So just thinking about what your customers or who would be watching the webinar, what they would want to see, that can be a source of emotional intelligence, right. Because you're putting their emotional and work wellbeing first versus being, this is what I want to show you, right. Making sure it's oriented around them. So, that's a way that you can do that over Zoom. Then also, in general self- awareness as well, Right. So, you can only be as emotionally intelligent as you are self- aware. If you walk into a room and you're like, ugh, this place sucks. Excuse me, my language, sorry. People are like, oh, what's wrong? You're like, oh, I'm having a great time. You are clearly not evoking or provoke, just, you're not sharing that feeling. You are very much not giving off a great vibe. So making sure that you're giving the space, as well, for other people, acknowledging how much space you take up and then being able to say, okay, my strength in this situation is X, Y, Z, and making sure that you can also play it up with other people as well and test out their waters and see what they're comfortable doing. Because if somebody is very shy and off to the corner, maybe engaging them in a conversation with a huge group isn't going to be the greatest thing. But maybe you want to go over there afterwards and be like, hi, just want to introduce myself. Same thing with customers, right. You might be in a Zoom meeting with people who, there's 40 customers on a call, right. You're on a huge contract with a government contract, for example, and there are people who are, camera's off, muted, you never hear from them. I do a weird thing where it's, I'll email them afterwards and be like, it was really nice to meet you. If you have any questions, please let me know. But just making sure that you put yourself, if you're self aware and you know that you can give yourself the space to speak and let other people feel comfortable enough to speak and feel their qualms or whatever it may be so that's one other thing. And then...

Speaker 3: Yeah, absolutely. Something that you brought up is something that Josh brought up in our mini session, is you can try to convey empathy even if you don't all the way mean it, if you're pretending, but if you don't have the authenticity part of that, it won't get you very far. So, it's interesting that your group also picked up on that.

Speaker 4: Yeah.

Speaker 3: crosstalk.

Speaker 4: I should go... Ooh. Do you guys want me to keep going with the emotional, the recharging, or should we go with another group for that?

Speaker 3: Whatever, I mean, if there's something that you feel could benefit the group, I'd love to hear it.

Speaker 4: Sure. I mean, one thing that we also talked about, when it came to recharging, is understanding what, for me at least, what your tick is. So if you see yourself running into a wall 45 times and be like, ugh, this is so frustrating, ugh, I don't want to do this, I don't want to be here, I don't want to be doing this right now. That should be a note of like, okay, maybe you should take a step back instead of feeling that frustration. Taking some space away from whatever it may be that you're doing. If it's 10 minutes, 15 minutes, an hour, two hours, 30 minutes, whatever. Whatever you have time for, just separating yourself from the situation, taking a break and then coming back and trying to understand what is frustrating you about that, and then making a plan accordingly. So, that was what we talked about.

Speaker 3: Yeah. It goes back to the self- awareness thing, is if you're aware that you're reaching burn, I actually had a friend who posted a poll on Instagram the other day, when she was like, when do you actually ask for a mental health day? My answer was probably a week after I should have taken a mental day.

Speaker 4: Yeah. That's too true.

Speaker 3: Yeah. Cool. Thank you so much for sharing. Room two, that was Anita, Ashley, Alyssa, Holly. Does anybody want to share?

Holly: Yeah, I have been nominated, or volunteered as spokesperson. So we talked a lot about self, excuse me, emotional intelligence is being curious about yourself and what are you going through and why are you reacting to things a certain way, and then the same thing for our customers. What's behind what they're doing, right? Really having empathy is a big part of that emotional intelligence. We talked a lot too about the pandemic and just the group, the collective trauma that we've all experienced. Obviously, some people have much more significant levels of trauma...

Speaker 3: Yeah.

Holly: ...In the last year and a half, but we've all had this collectively traumatic experience. But I think one of the, not to say that it's a positive thing, but there are some positives that have come out of it and one of the things we talked about is maybe a renewed focus on emotional intelligence and maybe a renewed focus on the importance of mental health, as being almost a driver. In my experience, that's a driver for the resignations we're seeing, is people are realizing that mental health is too important to sacrifice over a job. Then, when we were talking about recharging, we had a really great conversation around that. Especially Jocelyn in our group, her team is really going through quite some difficult reshuffling right now. We were just talking about all of our best ideas and the top one that we talked about is going outside. Especially if you can get outside in the middle of the day at lunch and take a quick walk, even when the weather's gross and you feel like it's going to be bad and then you go outside and you're like, actually that was really worthwhile. So that was probably our top idea. Then taking your PTO, taking those mental health days.

Speaker 3: Yeah.

Holly: I think those were some other big ideas that we had.

Speaker 3: Yeah, sounds really awesome.

Holly: Anyone else on my team, feel free to jump in there.

Speaker 6: We can't forget about Schitt's Creek. If you don't know about it, 20, 25 minute episode, watch it when you're eating lunch. Your life will be inaudible for it.

Speaker 3: That's awesome. Well, thank you. Thank you all so much for sharing that. Something else that also came up in the mini group was the pandemic and the reshuffling and how it has brought attention to mental health and has also made folks more open to talk about how they're feeling in their current job. Having more open conversations about salary brackets and different industries and startup environments versus more established companies. I feel, at least within my company, that peer to peer conversations about how happy they are in the role or their career trajectory, it's not the type of conversations I would be having back in 2015. I feel like back in 2015, I would probably hesitate a little bit to ask my peers, just curious, where's your salary bracket? How are you feeling, career trajectory wise? I feel like now, it's a time where folks are 100% more open to do that. Thank you for sharing, Holly.

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Speaker 3: Let me see. Room three, that's Amy, Arif, Lisa and Nick. Would anybody care to share?

Nick: Yeah, this is Nick. I'm happy to talk about what we discussed. I should start with the second point. Talk a little bit about recharging. We spent a decent bit of time talking about that. I don't want to be too redundant, definitely with the pandemic. Totally separating from work has been a necessity, I would argue. I'm sure everyone here can relate, super easy to sit at home and be on your computer until eight o'clock because you're there, you're home and that's what work has become. So, we talked about taking breaks and making sure that you're resting and making sure that you're up to speed with what you need to be on. I think what's super important as well, in order for you to be the best person that you can possibly be for your colleagues, your family, your clients, et cetera, you need to take care of yourself. You are the most important thing, first and foremost, Setting boundaries, and we call them expectations. Setting expectations about what's going on, I think, is important. Again, it's easy to sit at home until eight, nine o'clock at night working, but that doesn't have to be the norm. Again, just taking breaks and stuff. So, there's that and then in terms of emotional intelligence, I will not take credit for this. This was all Amy. I think, probably, one of my favorite things I've heard in a long time, two things. Everyone's an adult in the room so stop and think before you react. I think that's really powerful. I forget to do it sometimes. Then also be kind, be true and be necessary. That really resonated with me. That's crosstalk.

Speaker 3: That's awesome.

Nick: Then, the last thing I'll say there. In terms of that emotional intelligence, something that we talked about, I do this, this is a Gmail thing. I don't know if you all use Outlook or Gmail. There's a, you can do a delayed send on your email. I can't tell you how many times, not necessarily, I probably shouldn't have said that, but the grammar's awful in this email or I forgot to send an attachment. It's super easy to just stop that from being sent and take it back and make the edit you need and send it off. Also good, though, in case you read it over and say, mm, I don't like the tone in that or maybe that comes across a little too strong.

Speaker 3: Oh, yeah. Mm- hmm( affirmative). My partner is in sales and he'll have me edit his emails and he'll say, does this sound too mean? I'm like, yeah, we need to delete this entire paragraph and start over.

Speaker 8: I found that I actually draft up the emails without putting the recipient's name in the'to address' field. That way, I can write it out, write whatever the hell I want to write and not feel bad about it. Then if, once I'm ready to send it, then I put the name in there and I'm like, okay, I can read through it or copy and paste it, send it to somebody and have them review it. It's funny how often, when you do that to yourself, you find that you might be a bit of a jerk. If you are willing to see that for yourself, it's really easy to edit and be less of a jerk when you're sending things, so just another little hint that I've found that works.

Speaker 3: Very nice. Room four, we have Nathan, Michelle, Bentley, Mizar, Reza and Stacy. Who would like to share?

Nathan: Yep. I volunteered as tribute for our team. Yeah, so again, we talked about a lot of the same things that have been talked about already, but I do think that the need to step away from the work that you're doing, especially in the industry. I know we saw a lot of heads nodding. That's really, really important right now. I think that's something we all discussed. Even just stepping away from situations that are bad, right, in the day, in the moment, is important. So, I really do want to just add extra energy to that statement, that that's really important, especially as the majority of us, I think, are working remotely right now and there isn't anyone that's holding you to your desk. There are no chains except the invisible ones that you put on yourself, to stay there. So definitely take that time. I think the schedule send is something we didn't talk about, but it's definitely something that has saved me a lot of heartache and hassle over the years, so absolutely is a tool that helps. Again, give you a little bit extra time to just review, how am I coming across and what is being said to my customer, to my client, to my internal team, to my manager? It's a really useful tool and I would just say, use that liberally, everywhere. It can really, really protect you from having a bad day and then saying something that you have to walk back or have to figure out where you go from there.

Speaker 3: Yeah.

Nathan: So, definitely an encouragement. But team, did I miss anything major there? I feel like, anyone else in room four, if I miss something, hit me upside the head.

Speaker 3: Cool. Well, thank you so much for sharing, Nathan. We have just over five minutes left, so I want to make sure we get to room five. That's Brandon, Brian, citizen, which I'm pretty sure was Josh, Michelle and Scott.

Brian: Well, I don't mind jumping in for the team. We talked about a lot of the same things that everybody discussed, really along the lines of, one way to make sure you don't have to focus too much on recharging is don't let yourself get worn down to begin with.

Speaker 3: Mm- hmm( affirmative).

Brian: Have that clear separation between work and life. That is very difficult to do while a lot of us are working from home. One thing we discussed that I haven't heard mentioned is, take time to do things for yourself in terms of hobbies. I prefer making things. I don't get to see the actual product that I help make here, in my current role but if I go make something in a woodworking shop or cook something, that is something that really helps recharge me personally, because I can say, oh, look at this thing that I made.

Speaker 3: Mm- hmm( affirmative).

Brian: So it's really finding the things that make you feel good in pursuing those.

Speaker 3: Yeah. So, that's actually a really good point. I was just thinking back in my head, all of the little odd hobbies I picked up during the pandemic. One, to keep me busy, and two, it did help de- stress. I think I did acrylic pouring at some point and I also made a couple of art projects around the house. They don't look that great so they're not on my walls, but nevertheless, I did do it and dedicate some time to it. Cool. We have five minutes left. If anybody has anything to, oh, Oliver, you do. You have your hand up. Hi.

Oliver: Yeah. Just on Brian's word. About, I think sometimes you're so entrenched in work, there's so much pressure, that you don't realize, yourself, that you are on the way to burnout. It's happened to me, right. All the signals were there, but I just kept on going, ah. I'll just go, go, go, go, right, and eventually the straw broke, right. But it's, listening to people around you, right, being observant. Taking time for yourself, especially, sports is maybe a cliche, but getting out, doing something. Just going for a walk, even that is active. Doing sports so you can disconnect and getting those endorphins, right. It just is a, helps so much with mental health, but it's, everybody's different, right. Everybody has different pressures. Mental health is such a difficult thing. It's so personal, it's so different to everybody, right. I'm getting a bit emotional talking about it, but it's tough, right. You just, I think, be aware of your surroundings, what people tell you, right. I had a colleague who was saying, I went to a meeting, right, with a customer and he came out and he said, look, you weren't yourself. What's wrong? Right, and I didn't listen to him. I just, oh, don't worry about it, I'm just having a bad day but a few weeks later, I just crashed, right.

Speaker 3: Yeah.

Oliver: Just being aware, right, around your surroundings.

Speaker 3: Yeah. That's amazing. Thank you so much for sharing that, Oliver. I know it's tough to figure out, especially when you're past the point of burnout. It's really tough to back pedal and recover and you should take the time to reset. Absolutely. If nobody else wants to share anything, I did want to give you a little bit of preview of what we're going to start doing next quarter with Gain Grow Retain. We're going to start to dedicate an entire session to, or an entire topic to DEI. So diversity, equality, and inclusion. It's a topic that I think is near and dear to a lot of the GGR members, as well as myself and something that Mike Lee has integrated into these sessions that he hosted was something called DEI moments. It's about two minutes of just an example of a small DEI moment where you could be more inclusive. So I will give an example of a question that I hate or that I dread when people ask, and the question is" Where did you grow up?" or" Where is your hometown?" It's something that's super simple. It's a very simple question, but people's reaction to my answer is usually why I brace myself. So I grew up in South Central Los Angeles, and for those folks who don't know, it has a reputation of being a dangerous place to live. Definitely not a nice area that somebody would choose to live in, I would say. But usually, people's reaction to that, whether it be a slight change in their response to me or the" Oh, interesting," makes me dreadfully uncomfortable. So those, when you get those kind of responses, because the question is harmless, I do want to say the question is harmless. When you get those kind of responses, just be, like what we said today, be self- aware in how you respond, because folks are usually hyper aware of your reaction, and being inclusive is embedded in every single interaction, even as small as your reaction of where are you from or where did you grow up. So that's just a tiny example of where you can be more inclusive and more self- aware, for folks who maybe come from different economic backgrounds or an area that has a negative connotation. But starting next quarter for Gain Grow Retain, we will have a whole topic on diversity, equity and inclusion. I'll be hosting that, I believe, January 22nd. I just wanted to give you all a heads up.

Oliver: Sounds great.

Lisa: Yeah. It's great. Thanks so much, everybody. Have to go to 11: 30. Have a good week.

Speaker 3: crosstalk Lisa. See you. Thank you.

Speaker 14: Thank you, everybody. Take care. Bye.

Speaker 15: crosstalk.

Speaker 16: Thanks, everybody. Awesome job.

Speaker 12: Hey guys, thanks so much for taking the time to listen to the Gain Grow Retain Podcast. If you liked what you heard, please take a moment and share the podcast with your friends and colleagues and subscribe. We really appreciate it. Talk to you soon.


This week the topic for discussion is around working remotely, balancing your work and home life.

A weekly segment:

CSM Office Hours

Every Tuesday. 11:30am ET.


If you want to join the discussion with thousands of other customer success leaders, join

Gain Grow Retain:

This podcast is brought to you by Jay Nathan and Jeff Breunsbach...

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